Domestic inadequacy, strange fits of goddess-ness, and visual evidence. Because if I’m going to fail or succeed at being SuperWoman, I’m going to revel in it.
It was time. For years, SuperWoman waited patiently for shows like The Sopranos and Six Feet Under and The Wire to come on DVD, scattered in with the sleeves of classic and independent films. In her apartment days, SuperWoman worshipped at the altar of Netflix, perhaps the singular capitalist god she appreciated. At the time, [...]
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It was a Thursday, late March. SuperWoman needed to kill two hours between the time she picked up her progeny from school and made dinner for them. (Okay, fine. Until SuperMan made dinner—blah blah blah—and SuperWoman sipped a glass of wine.) Luckily, SuperWoman doesn’t have to spend as many hours as she used to finding [...]
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Yesterday, SuperWoman had the misfortune to wake up with a stomach bug. It seems Valentine’s Day gave her a virus. And it had nothing to do with love. Yes, even superheroes get sick. Superwoman spent 36 hours in bed, with brief bouts in the bathroom, hugging the toilet bowl, worrying about germs the menfolk may [...]
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The good things about January, you say? SuperWoman will admit, this list is a stretch. But it’s part of her master plan of “acceptance,” so humor her. Here goes. 1. If you forget your groceries in the trunk of your car overnight, they will stay cold. (SuperWoman only did this twice.) 2. People will say [...]
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Welcome to 2012, year of the apocalypse! Did you notice how unusually warm the weather is? That’s because the world is going to end. No matter. SuperWoman thinks resolutions should happen all year long, not just at the beginning of a new year. But she’s a sucker for any chance for reflection and self-improvement. What, [...]
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You haven’t heard much from SuperWoman lately, because she’s busy. See, Autumn is her season. She goes and goes and goes, and kind of likes it that way. But now that winter is coming, SuperWoman can feel it in her bones. (And in her stomach and thighs, unfortunately.) Once red and flaming, she is now [...]
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SuperWoman is going incognito today at the BlogHer Writers’ Conference. Humidity has abated, the fairies have listened to her cries, and she is off to strut around New York City amid the rushing morning crowds. No one even knows she has bright blue spandex on under her jeans, or that her comfortable clogs are also [...]
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SuperWoman gives up. It is the middle of October, and everything is sticky. Sticky leaves, sticky streets. Sticky countertops and wooden tables. The floor, especially, exudes a gumminess. Even her children have developed a greasy film. Everything is dirty, and who the hell has the time—or desire—to clean it? (Except the ants, who will outlive [...]
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You haven’t heard from SuperWoman in a while. That’s cause she’s friggin’ busy. A few weeks ago, she started back at her undercover job as “part-time English instructor,” and, since then, has hardly had time to clean the shit that keeps hitting the fan. Mostly, she’s just looking at the shit up there and all [...]
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